2.03 am in the morning and I wake up because I hear my little munchkin crying in his bassinet right beside my bed. I know he is hungry so without hesitation I jump out of bed and start the feeding and changing diaper routine. By the time that I am done it will be around 3 or 3.30 am and I know that you have to pump immediately if I want to improve my insufficient milk supply… The little one will be asking for food again around 5-6am-ish (at least that’s my case now that he’s three months old) so I’d better hurry up and start pumping right away.
It’s almost 4.30am now and I am done pumping. In an hour or so the little peanut will be waking up again and demanding my attention so I’d better go back to sleep.
After sleeping for a little bit of time, the baby starts screaming again. This time he is more impatient than before because he has been asleep for half an hour longer than usual so he wants his food and he wants it NOW. I look at the clock, it’s 6.24am in the morning. And so we start the feeding and diaper routine again and this time, luckily enough, I am done in less than one hour. I put him back to sleep and now I think:
It’s almost 7.30am, what should I do? Should I go back to sleep again or do I start my day organizing the mess (because everything’s been a mess for the past 3 months and you know it) and doing some productive work at home?
Most of the days I pick up the second option, turn on the baby monitor and here we go! Declutter a bit, clean up the kitchen and prepare some breakfast, fold the clothes that were left on the dryer the night before, etc… I know I don’t have much time because my little peanut will be asking for his second round of breakfast around 9am so I’d better hurry up. The day is definitely on.
And so the days go by, one by one, and with them the sleepless nights in which you rest for 3-4 hours in a row (if you are lucky). And one day, one of these days that you feel completely exhausted and your energy is completely drained, you ask yourself:
What gets me going? For how long am I going to be able to continue doing this without breaking down of exhaustion?
And right when I feel like giving up, right when I think that it is enough and I need some rest, right when I think that the exhaustion got me and I can’t continue, in that exact moment is when I hear my little one crying, asking for mama’s attention and I can automatically feel a strike of energy that who knows where it’s coming from but off I go again, heading to the baby’s bassinet and making sure that he’s safe and sound.
And that’s the thing, mamas are baby fueled and no matter how exhausted we feel or how many hours of sleep we have on our backs, as soon as we hear our baby we will keep on going, because the well-being of our bundle of joy is our number one priority and our love for him is what will give us the strength that we need to continue, day by day.
This post is dedicated to all the “baby-fueled” mamas out there. You are doing an AMAZING job and you know it!